Dear ManJournal
by kingslayers
Summary: So, this is part of the nextgen fanatics forum collabaration, but it's been formatted a little better...  Check inside for details!  Scorp and Al friendship, mentions of Scorrose


**Hey everyone!**

**This fic is up on the nextgen fanatics forum collab, but I forgot you couldn't do strikethroughs on , but you _can_ on DocX :P**

**So confusing :/**

**Anyway, I re-posted it here, but with a guide, so I don't confuse y'all.**

**-insertwordhere- means strikethrough, okay? If you can't imagine it, PM me, and I'll DocX it to you :)**

**Um... Normal writing is Scorp, and italics (apart from in Scor's bits ;]) are Al...**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything, no matter how sexy Scorpius is ;)**

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><p>To Man-Journal,<p>

First off, THIS IS NOT A DIARY! Secondly, I refuse to say 'dear', as it is far too feminine for such a manly Gryffindor such as myself. Shut up Al, I'm very manly!

NOW STOP READING MY -DIARY- MAN-JOURNAL!

Actually that reminds me…

Al, James, Hugo, Fred, Louis: If you are reading this, I'm going to hex you until you beg for mercy.

Rose: Please don't hurt me! Shut UP, Al, I am _so_ a Gryffindor! Rosie is just _bloody scary_. No offence, Rose.

Roxanne, Molly, Lucy, Lily: **WHY** are you reading this? Who put you up to this? Al, your family is _evil_. Please don't hex me! My hair didn't lose the pink for a week after that time in March…

Dominique, Victoire, Teddy:….. How the bloody _**hell**_ did you get this? You don't even go to Hogwarts anymore!

Anyway, now that all the appropriate threats have been issued, let us get back to the issue at hand.

ME.

Yes, the wonder that is the sexy Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy.

I am amazing. I am stupendous. I am confused. Yes, I, Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, the amazingly stupendously sexily Gryffindor smart alec… is confused.

You see, MJ, the apocalypse has come.

Rose is (and I shudder with horror as I write this) a _girl_.

I know. Imagine my shock. I mean, _obviously_ I always knew she was a girl. I just didn't realise she had feminine tendencies.

I mean, she blushed at _Montague_, for Merlin's sake. _Langdon Montague. _That stupid, stuck-up prat of a Slytherin who I had always thought was alright. Obviously, he was just being sneaky in order to corrupt -my- Rose.

And it's _weird._ Rose is all _giggly_ around him, and it's annoying me.

I mean, this morning, at breakfast, I was telling a joke (it was amazing, MJ, absolutely amazing) and she just _stared_ at me. But all -Satan- Montague had to do was send her a wink. A _bloody wink_. And she _giggled_. Like a _girl_.

I felt quite odd, to be honest. All… ROAR with no reason. Suddenly, it was like there was this bloody Hippogriff in my chest, kicking, and it bloody hurt. It also made me want to punch the -devil spawn- Montague. I mean, no-one makes -MY- Rosie giggle, apart from me, and her excessive family (… You know you love me? Don't hurt me!)

MJ, why is this so confusing? I'm a sexy, amazing, completely awesome 14 year old boy. I got a _Firebolt_ for Christmas. I should be on top of the world!

But I'm not.

(not so) Fabulously yours,

Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy

_My dearest Scorpykins,_

_This is __**definitely**__ a diary. Oh, of course you are. How could one such as I refute your -__girliness-__ manliness? Oh, Scorpius, there is no point in writing such feeble threats. I shall never beg for mercy! Well… Hugo might. But that is beside the point!_

_(And you shall __**pay**__ for that evil comment.. It isn't my fault your feeble mind cannot compute with the awesomeness that is me. And my family too, I guess)_

_The point is – actually, there are several points._

_ONE) Who the __**bloody hell **__told you that you were __**SEXY**__? They are sadly mistaken, my beloved mate._

_TWO) …. Who the HELL said that you were smart? They were obviously confused. How have you not managed to notice Rose is a girl? That's why she __**doesn't**__ dorm with us, idiot._

_THREE) Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, I feel the need to inform you of a fact._

_You, my dearly beloved friend, are completely and utterly whipped. For a girl you aren't even dating. Merlin, Scorp, that's pathetic._

_FOUR) Ah, my darling Scorpius, that is called _jealousy_. _

_FIVE) You're paying for that too. I don't love you enough to let that slide. Though I wouldn't say no to a day at Madame Puddifoots with a romantic atmosphere…. ;)_

_SIX) Merlin, where did you find all those adjectives, Scorp? Found a book of antonyms for your name?_

_SEVEN) Well, I got a_ Firebolt_ two years ago. SO THERE!_

_Completely amazingly yours,_

_Albus Severus Potter_

AL! WHAT THE HELL? Did you not read where it CLEARLY STATES 'NOW STOP READING MY MAN-JOURNAL!'?

Just because you're jealous…

I know she's a girl. I just didn't realise she was a _girl_.

I AM NOT WHIPPED FOR ROSE! THAT WOULD IMPLY THAT I LIKE HER, WHICH I SO OBVIOUSLY -DO- DON'T! And I am _never_ pathetic.

I AM NOT JEALOUS OF THAT STUPID PRAT!

… I am wordless, Al. I didn't realise you felt that way. I must inform you I don't return your feelings, as I -like your cousin- am enjoying being a bachelor.

What the heck is an antonym? It sounds like some underwater fungi..

**Fine then! **Ruin my only piece of good news.

Sexily yours (except not _yours_, Al),

Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy

_SCORPIKINS!_

_Of course I noticed. I just disregarded it :)_

_ONE) Oh, Scorpykins, I could totally score more girls than you._

_TWO) … Because _that_ made sense, oh Lord-of-the-Words_

_THREE) Dude. You like her. You are whipped for her. She likes you, Merlin knows why. KISS THE GIRL! And you are pathetic lots of the time._

_FOUR) Scorp, you had no problem with Montague until Rose giggled. -__She only giggled because he was twitching his eyelid funny-__ Jealousy ;)_

_FIVE) The word 'bachelor' normally implies your single status is by choice…_

_SIX) It means opposite of… Holy Merlin's green smelly boxers! I, Albus Severus Potter the Awesome, knows something that SCORPIUS HYPERION MALFOY DOESN'T! Mark it down in history, baby._

_SEVEN) It's only because it's easy to do, that I do it :)_

_A.S.P._

Asp? You want to be a snake now, do you?

I'm just going to ignore that.. See how YOU like it!

Like hell you could. Anyway, it doesn't matter because -I like Rose- you like Megan.

It did!

I.. maybe I do. But it doesn't make a difference, because she could never like me.

HE CORRUPTED ROSE! SHE DOESN'T GIGGLE!

… Shut up, Albus Severus.

Did you just call me _baby_?

Go away. I hate you.

S.H.M.

_Shm? And you make fun of MY initials?_

_I don't care, Scorp XD_

_ONE) Shut up, Scorp. You like my cousin. That's weird._

_TWO) No, it really didn't…_

_THREE) Scorpius, she __**does**__ like you. Kiss her, you'll see._

_FOUR) … Yes, _that's_ why you don't like him. _

_FIVE) Oh, are you bringing middle names into this, __**SCORPIUS HYPERION?**_

_SIX) Oh, Merlin. It's a Muggle reference._

_SEVEN) __**YOU LOVE ME REALLY!**_

_A.S.P._

Dear Man-Journal,

I have big news.

_Rose_ **kissed** me!

Oh Merlin, it was _awesome_.

I sense this is the beginning of the pure awesomeness known as _Rose&Scorpius_

SCORPIUS

_Scorpius,_

_It's still a diary. You're still whipped._

_But I have to say something:_

_I TOLD YOU SO!_

_A.S.P._

_P.S. Merlin, you sound so _girly_! It scares me…_

I have recently decided I am no longer keeping a diary Man-Journal….

Farewell, MJ.

And just for the record, I do _not_ sound like a girl.

So there.

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><p><strong>So, um, if the -insertwordhere- didn't do it for you, I'm happy to DocX it to you, but can you please review the fic for the content?<strong>

**Thanks! **

**And there are a lot more fics of higher merit on the nextgen fanatics account, so check it out!**

**Love**

**Jane**


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